And if he is not ready to be a husband, dating him could only have a sorrowful outcome.Marriage is a covenantal bond between a man and a woman where there is dependence—to a certain extent.However, a husband is responsible to lead his wife in sanctification, as this verse explains with the imagery of Christ and His bride.
Proverbs makes it clear that you will only be ensnared. You may actually become an enabler who receives the brunt of his anger. Those little childlike qualities may seem really cute right now, but it will grow old (and aggravating) shortly into marriage. If a man is not responsible with his time, money, and work, why would he be responsible in his future family life? You should also consider your date’s relationships with other people.
Spouse abuse by an angry man does not usually randomly begin fifteen years into a marriage. Abuse is not only physical- it can also be emotional. If he is more concerned with worldly pleasure than pleasing God in being an honorable and responsible man, this is not the kind of man who will rightly point his family toward Christ-likeness. The Bible has a name for the guy who has the Peter-Pan syndrome: he is called “the sluggard.” Proverbs mentions him several times, including in Proverbs 6:9-11, which states, “How long will you lie there, O sluggard? A little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest, and poverty will come upon you like a robber, and want like an armed man.” What is this man’s work ethic? Is he unhealthily dependent on his friends or family?
While you do not want that to happen, it is reality. Also, if he wants you to meet all his needs, that is close to idolatry (Exodus 20:3, 4). Do not fall for the statement of, “I just care about you so much,” when a guy won’t keep his hands to himself.
You will disappoint each other, not on purpose, but you will. The truth is, he cares more about himself in that scenario.
If we as women are unwilling to be above reproach in these areas, why should we expect that from men?
If you have just spotted some serious red flags in your dating relationship, seek counsel from wise, confidential people in your church community.
Choose wisely, and trust God’s sovereignty if that man has not come along yet.
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It can be difficult to be clear-headed in a dating relationship.
It is easy to see only the positive in the other person and completely ignore any warning signs. It would be foolish to date someone and not even consider the possible outcomes.
I am not implying that a man has to be a prude, but he is to be a protector.