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Homosexuality is attraction between two people of the same sex, or conceivably more than two, but forget "conceivably," as there is never any conception. The first documentation of the gay lifestyle appear during the the Greco-Roman era, but at the time it was referred to as "wrestling." The Greeks, of course, were all gay as modern playwrights. These days, one cannot even talk about blowing a bassoon without having eyebrows rise.Researchers consider it to be either an abomination or the most sublime lifestyle possible. One could have a gay day without having to stick anything anywhere, and even persons whose surname was "Gay" could probably get through school with most of their own teeth. Charles Darwin, who knew quite a bit about evolution, asserted that homosexuality had "no evolutionarily useful attributes." As the "homosexuality gene" is passed from parent to child, and homosexuals do not breed, Darwin predicted that the species Homo sexualis would become extinct within a single generation.

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Scientists believe there are chromosomes in the human imposed during birth that determine the sexual preference of an individual, but some scientists--most commonly psychologists--impose the "Catholic priesthood" theory of homosexuality that suggests this behavior can become an acquired preference. A second leading environmental cause of homosexuality is failing internet "gay tests".Because if you fail the test after viewing one picture, or answering one trick question wrong, you obviously are a homosexual.God got angry because man was actually starting to have more fun than him, and established the Ten Commandments to mostly eliminate fun.When no one really listened (especially to the one against adultery), He committed adultery with a virgin, who gave birth to Jesus.And the earth was without form, and void; and darkness was upon the face of the deep.

And the Spirit of God moved upon the face of the waters.A useful alternative for the moderate is to be bisexual.This means two-sexed (and not half-sexed, which would be the vanishingly rare disexual). Rush Limbaugh (pictured) has called bisexuality "the most gutless decision you can make" as it is really no decision at all.Then in the 1960s some stoned hippies decided it would be "right on" to "liberate the gay oppressed minority Maaaan", and as a result we now have to listen to everyone banging on about sodomy again.Before they lay down, the men of the city, both young and old, surrounded the house; and they called to Lot and said to him, "Where are the women who came to you tonight?Limbaugh claims that bi's are the most selfish individuals, as their sexuality is merely a ploy to ensure the absolute maximum number of possible partners (bestiality being outside the scope of this article).