How can I get comfortable enough with the entire issue so I can start to unravel sex from rape; what’s healthy and what’s not?
" Wendy: Don't confuse sex (healthy sex based on caring and respect) with abusive sex (domination/exploitation and pain).
Wendy: Most good therapists understand self-harm as a repercussion of sex abuse.The key is whether you convey you want to heal and stop the behavior or not.You know we use the word "making love" a lot in our culture--but how many of us really take it to heart when we are relating sexually? Wendy: You can contact for a list of sex therapist in your area.Whitney: I know that Jennifer has been receiving many questions from the members here, so I'll turn the floor over to her now that you've answered so many of our preselected questions - thank you so much! Most of what I submit will show up in the members' own words, but some questions I will have to re-format for the room. But interview them first as to how much they know and have helped survivors (one's who are familiar with my work are good bets).Also the free article on the site: "The Maltz Hierarchy of Sexual Interaction" can help make important distinctions. QUESTION: "-How do I work on sexual healing if I don't have a partner right now? QUESTION: "-How can you start a healthy sexual relationship after a long absence?
How can you re-establish comfort with your partner and not feel as though you’ve regressed?Begin with developing a positive concept for what you want to experience.I have a comparison chart of abusive/addictive sex with healthy sex on my website. Focus on good self-care and having a healthy sexual sense of yourself. Develop ways to pleasure yourself that enhance your self-esteem both sexually and non-sexually. Focus on what you want in a partner and go for it, don't settle for less.You can find information in my book The Sexual Healing Journey on them and how they work.QUESTION: Can that be treated medically or is it more of a therapeutic issue? Touch issues are common, especially in the beginning of healing.Some survivors suffer from a condition called vaginismus that involves the involuntary contracting of the outer third of the vagina upon attempted entry.